Feeling All Right, Sir?

I recently applied for a graduate assistantship (GA) in the English department at BSU. A GA would mean that my graduate credits for the next two years would be paid for, and I would receive an additional $4000 per semester for teaching a section of College Writing.

That would be, what is known as, "A good thing."

And on this, the day of my 22nd birthday, I received the reply.

The verdict...